The Church is a powerhouse of involuntary comedy. Between Jesus resurrecting on a confusing timeline and Cain somehow finding a wife in an empty world, Catholic doctrine feels like a glitchy simulation. It’s a place where 1+1+1 equals 1, where sacred cannibalism is a Sunday ritual, and where a "merciful" God sends bears to maul children over a bald joke. If this post earns me excommunication, I’ll welcome the Swiss Guard with a laugh. Logic died long ago, and it didn't rise a